The Brick Theater

WHEN: June 5–July 4
WHERE: The Brick Theater, 575 Metropolitan Ave between Lorimer St and Union Ave, Williamsburg, Brooklyn (718-907-6189, bricktheater.com)

One of the more unusual plays in this year’s Antidepressant Festival is Adventure Quest, which mimics old-school computer adventure games, combining live action with vintage graphics and 8-bit music. For those too young to remember these strange, puzzle-intensive artifacts of the Reagan era, the creators of Adventure Quest have been kind enough to provide a brief “walk-through” that captures the genre’s peculiar narrative conventions.

You are standing before of the Castle of Perpetual Delight. Blocking your path is a gloomy-looking centaur.

You are currently holding: a portable cauldron, a pair of diamond cufflinks, a unicorn femur, an Octopus Cult pamphlet, a waterskin and a magnifying glass.

Click here to speak to the centaur.

You are standing in the market square of the town of Despairington. There are several buildings here, including the potter’s shop, the pie factory and the apothecary. Each appears to have been long abandoned. (Their owners were presumably among the many townspeople who joined the Octopus Cult last winter and killed themselves by drinking poisoned ink.) A large boomerang rests on a nearby crate of mangos.

You are currently holding: a portable cauldron, a pair of diamond cufflinks, a unicorn femur, an Octopus Cult pamphlet, a waterskin and a magnifying glass.

Click here to pick up the boomerang.

This is a quality boomerang, made out of smooth, sanded wood. It feels light and deadly in your hands.

Click here to enter the apothecary.

Despairington’s apothecary is dimly lit and covered with a thick layer of dust. Its shelves are still lined with various salves and elixirs; they stand as mute testament to a time before the owner dressed his children in their finest clothing, led them to the Church of the Tentacle, and handed each of them a paper cup brimming with mango juice and dark swirls of octopus ink. You notice a Potion of Good Cheer sitting on the top shelf, but it is too high to reach.

You are currently holding: a portable cauldron, a boomerang, a pair of diamond cufflinks, a unicorn femur, an Octopus Cult pamphlet, a waterskin and a magnifying glass.

Hmm, how to get that potion?… Maybe…the boomerang?

Click here to use the boomerang to knock down the potion.

You are standing in the market square of the town of Despairington. There are several buildings here, including the potter’s shop, the pie factory and the apothecary.

You are currently holding: a portable cauldron, a boomerang, a pair of diamond cufflinks, a unicorn femur, an Octopus Cult pamphlet, a waterskin and a magnifying glass.

Click here to place the Octopus Cult pamphlet in the portable cauldron, then hold the magnifying glass above the cauldron for five to ten minutes until the pamphlet catches fire, then place the unicorn femur in the fire until it’s melted down into glue, then coat the boomerang with the glue, then cut a hole in the apothecary window with the diamond cufflinks and then throw the boomerang in the window to retrieve the Potion of Good Cheer.

<p>Click here to throw the boomerang.

You do all that, and the boomerang comes flying back with the Potion of Good Cheer attached to it. Hurrah!

Click here to go back to the centaur.

The centaur visibly brightens as he drinks the potion. “Wow!” he says. “I can see now that my pessimism was totally disproportionate to the setbacks I’ve faced, which are really quite manageable. Now that I’ve been freed from these toxic cycles of thought, I can become a more confident and self-reliant centaur as I develop productive strategies for dealing with everyday challenges.” He trots off happily.

Click here to enter the Castle of Perpetual Delight.