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Valentine’s Day alternatives

Valentine’s Day alternatives

Dances with curry

Instead of Netflixing Dances with Wolves, squire your beloved to the Thunderbird American Indian Dancers’ 33rd Annual Dance Concert and Powwow ($20 for two). Iroquois and other tribes from around the country will be gathering at the Theater for the New City (155 First Ave at 10th St, 212-254-1109) to chant, stomp, boogie and share traditional stories from now until Feb 17. What’s more, all proceeds will benefit the Native American Scholarship Fund, so you’ll come off as a sensitive supporter of the arts and disenfranchised youth.

After the show, demonstrate to your mate that you can be as macho as John Wayne by plowing through the excruciatingly spicy phaal curry with tofu ($30 for two) at Brick Lane Curry House (306–308 E 6th St between First and Second Aves, 212-979-2900) four streets away. Touted by the menu as “more pain and sweat than flavor,” the fiery concoction will snag you bragging rights as well as a free beer from the owners when you manage to chow down on an entire serving.
This date features: mixed bag  |  dining

Cartoon network

More highbrow than a night of Futurama, Brooklyn artist Tommy Hartung’s animated short should motivate you to find a companion other than your TV set. Check out Hartung’s opening on Feb 14 from 6 to 8pm at Moti Hasson Gallery (535 W 25th St between Tenth and Eleventh Aves), where you can sip $3 drinks while watching on-screen creation Edward Holmes tackle ethnic stereotypes in a dreamscape setting.

An equally thought-provoking masterpiece is the fried octopus balls appetizer ($7) at nearby Japanese spot Izakaya Ten (207 Tenth Ave between 22nd and 23rd Sts, 212-627-7777). Follow up the seafood nuggets with sashimi salad ($13), diced filet mignon ($10) and fluke carpaccio ($11). Cap it off with sake’s more powerful cousin shochu ($14 for two), which should inspire you to find a spanking-new muse in your dining companion.
This date features: art  |  dining

Love-hate relationship

You don’t have to don all black and hang decapitated cupids outside your window to protest this Hallmark holiday: Just join other Feb 14 haters at 6pm at the Anti-Valentine’s Day Party ($40 for two), hosted by Meet Market Adventures at the newly renovated club Columbus 72 (246A Columbus Ave between 71st and 72nd Sts, 212-769-1492). Nibble on no-charge hors d’oeuvres while chugging $5 beers as you discuss how heart-shaped candies make you queasy.
This date features: drinks

Queen of hearts

Not into overpriced dinners and holding hands by candlelight? Grab some beer-marinated wurst ($8 for two) and share a fountain soda ($2) at low-key joint The New York City Hot Dog Company (105 Chambers St at Church St, 212-240-9550). If you’re not already suffering from heartburn, Diamanda’s Valentine’s Day Massacre ($40 for two) at the Knitting Factory (74 Leonard St between Broadway and Church St, 212-219-3132) should give you a case of gut-wrenching indigestion. At 6:30pm, prepare yourself for an avant-garde performance by goth chanteuse Diamanda Galás focusing on such uplifting topics as rape and genocide. Red attire is optional.
This date features:dining  |  music

Brief encounters

Your ADD is so strong that you can’t sit still through a two-hour film, let alone a Fellini marathon with that film buff you’ve been crushing on. Fortunately, the quickie flicks at Love Actually: Short Films about Love, Sex & Romance ($16 for two in advance at scenepr.com, $20 at the door) should bring the two of you together in a dimly lit room. From 7 to 9pm, the Millennium Theatre (66 E 4th St between Bowery and Second Ave) is screening works by up-and-coming NYC filmmakers followed by a Q&A with the directors.

Then amble four blocks to the film fest’s after-party from 9 to 11pm at slick Asian-inflected bar White Rabbit (145 E Houston between Eldridge and Forsyth Sts, 212-477-5005) where you won’t need an arsenal of magic tricks. Simply conjure up some Sweetie’s Kiss champagne cocktails ($10 for two) to have your lover hop into your bed.
This date features: film  |  drinks

Players’ ball

In the tradition of TV shows like Blind Date, The Fifth Wheel and The Bachelor, the hilarious PIT Dating Game ($20 for two) hooks up a trio of attractive NYC singles with potential suitors at 9:30pm at the People’s Improv Theater (154 W 29th St between Sixth and Seventh Aves, second floor; thepit-nyc.com). Watch the contestants squirm while answering ridiculous personal questions from the safe anonymity of the audience while toasting your significant other over glasses of wine ($10 for two) for sparing you from this public humiliation.

As delicious as a generous helping of schadenfreude, the thin-crust pizzas (from $5 for one) at industrial-chic pie haven Waldy’s Wood Fired Pizza & Penne (800 Sixth Ave between 27th and 28th Sts, 212-213-5042) will help fill the gnawing void in your bellies. Sidle up to the long wood counter or entice your companion with a couch date and get it to go.
This date features:mixed bag  |  dining

Reader’s picks

“I’m sitting in one of my favorite date spots right now—a lounge near Gramercy called Choice Kitchen & Cocktails (380 Third Ave between 27th and 28th Sts, 212-779-1380). There’s a fondue place nearby, Dip (416 Third Ave between 29th and 30th Sts, 212-481-1712), that makes a great dessert. I usually end the evening with my sometimes-unfortunate habit of sneaking into Bryant Park in the middle of the night with a date, but the weather makes that improbable in the winter. But not impossible.” —Andrew, East Harlem