Noel Gallagher

Time Out New York: Congratulations on Oasis selling out Madison Square Garden. It's a bit surprising for a band at this stage in its career to pack such a big room.
Noel Gallagher: It's none more surprising than to the people in the band, who are a bit taken aback by it. I don't know why we did it. Maybe there's an English convention in town that week. You tell me why—You live in New York.

TONY: Well, I think it's because Oasis started as a classic-rock band trapped in a young band's body—you've now grown into those ambitions.
Noel Gallagher: It'll be interesting to see the crowd. If it's young, then it means we've been passed down a generation. Sometimes I look at the front row of gigs and they're all kids. I think, What the fuck am I doing? But then I get to think, Hang on a minute—what are they doing? Shouldn't they be into people their own age? I'm kind of struggling with this at the minute. There's something undignified about a grown man pretending to be a 24-year-old onstage. I want to avoid going on too long—I don't want to be doing this for another ten years.

TONY: That's all well and good, but what would you do otherwise?
Noel Gallagher: I suppose the challenge is finding something to do. I haven't sat down and seriously thought about this, but the fact that I wouldn't immediately know what to do is no reason to carry on and turn into fucking Mick Jagger.

TONY: You know, one person who found a solution is Damon Albarn. He formed Gorillaz to avoid a cult of personality.
Noel Gallagher: I'm just not that pretentious. I come from the northwest of England—we don't do bullshit. You grab your guitar and you fucking get out of there. There's not of this Kraftwerk nonsense, getting robots to do the gig for ya.

TONY: You're like the Don Rickles of rock stars. If I run some names by you, can you insult them?
Noel Gallagher: Go on.

TONY: The White Stripes.
Noel Gallagher: We get the point—get a fucking bass player. I went to see them play. The first 15 minutes were fucking amazing. Then you just go, 'Awright, it all sounds the same.' Jack White is an astonishing guitarist—I'll give him that.

TONY: What about the Strokes?
Noel Gallagher: I like the Strokes, but I was very, very disappointed in their second album. I was also disappointed to read what fantastic reviews it got, when I know the people writing those reviews knew it was shit and were just kissing the Strokes' ass.

TONY: Well, Be Here Now got largely positive reviews, and you've admitted that the album is crap.
Noel Gallagher: When Morning Glory came out, the press universally dismissed it—then it went on to become one of the biggest-selling albums of all time. So when Be Here Now came out, they went the other way, and got that completely wrong. I know how much effort I put into writing that album—it was absolutely minuscule. I regret it. I wish we'd had a guru standing in the shadows saying, 'Take two years off.' But we were fucked up on cocaine, man. It was like, I don't want to stop!

TONY: Is it strange to still be in a band with your little brother? Personally, my brother and I don't see eye to eye, but we only have to meet up twice a year.
Noel Gallagher: It's not the ideal situation. If I knew then what I know now, I would have passed on joining his band. He's just a fucking idiot, you know? I wouldn't have bothered working with him in the first place. You may laugh at that, but I'm actually being serious. I probably wouldn't have had as much success, but I think I would have been happier.

TONY: Well...not that you really need to know this, but I probably would never have even met someone like my brother if we weren't related.
Noel Gallagher: You can't choose them, can you? I just find him dull. This kind of leery, hard-man exterior...when I know him and he's a fucking idiot. It just doesn't wash for me. I'm afraid.

Oasis plays Madison Square Garden Wednesday 22.