Old schooled

Photograph: Chrissy Lush

Dear Old Schooler: My sister is marrying a complete asshole! They were only together seven months when he proposed, and she’s 22. He treats women like dirt and I’m afraid she’s making the biggest mistake of her life. How can I help her see that she deserves better?—Lilly, 23, Morningside Heights

Evelyn Friedman, “over 65,” Forest Hills, Queens
Love is blind, and if we really paid attention to all the problems with marriage, no one would ever get married. The thing to do here is say what you think. If she marries him anyway, scram—until she gets divorced. I had a friend that I knew was marrying a difficult man, and I didn’t say anything. She was very unhappy with him, and it took a long time before they got a divorce. We’re still friends, and now we say that we would tell each other if we were with the wrong man. I had another friend who eloped after knowing a man for three weeks! But she made it work and they lived together until he died. Some people don’t mind jerks. Your sister may like the qualities he has and be able to overlook the qualities he doesn’t. It’s hard to find everything in one person.

See previous Old Schooled