Hipster bars

Zebulon

Photograph: Mimi Cabell

I want to up my cred
Zebulon
There is a definite air of legitimacy at this dimly lit French bar. That is to say, it generally caters to thoughtful, serious music enthusiasts and not necessarily sceney phonies whose idea of a good time is cheap cans of beer, the Hold Steady and sweaty, pale grope fests. The small dance floor in the back goes perfectly with the solid nightly musical accompaniment. 258 Wythe Ave between Metropolitan Ave and North 3rd Sts, Williamsburg, Brooklyn (718-218-6934, zebuloncafeconcert.com)

I just want to get laid
Mason Dixon
The clientele at this faux-Southern booze hall consists of about one third disaffected LESers and two thirds frat and sorority alums who somehow missed the irony and think they’ve stumbled into a genu-wiiine NYC honky-tonk. If you’re in the former group, this only makes for richer spectator sport. The beating heart of this place is the mechanical-bull ring in the back—an invitation to engage in the sexual banter that partyers of any subspecies can recognize. 133 Essex St between Rivington and Stanton Sts (212-260-4100)

I love bocce and Brits
Floyd, NY
This pubby tavern has plenty going for it: games (an indoor bocce court beats the hell out of darts—just be prepared to wait for a lane), a nice selection of whiskey and, oddly, a zealous New York Tottenham Hotspur Supporters Club (NYTHSC). 131 Atlantic Ave between Clinton and Henry Sts, Brooklyn Heights (718-858-5810)

Duck Duck

Photograph: Mimi Cabell

Bocce is for squares
Duck Duck
High-maintenance bargoers might cavil that Duck Duck lacks amenities, but it does have couches, a giant front window that remains open in the summer and a delightful air of anonymity that keeps it relatively unmolested by Union Pool rejects. 161 Montrose Ave between Graham Ave and Humboldt St, Williamsburg, Brooklyn (no phone)

Liquor before beer
B Flat
Named after the note to which John Coltrane tuned his sax, the Eastern-inflected B Flat, opened by the original bartenders of Angel’s Share, serves an odd cultural blend that’s catnip to the downtown cool-hunter. And it doesn’t hurt that the barmen know their stuff: On a recent visit, our server recommended a velvety smooth Japanese Yamazaki whiskey, aged 18 years, which went down perfectly with the joint’s sashimi-and-spring-roll apps. 277 Church St between Franklin and White Sts (212-219-2970)

Beer before liquor
The Levee
When the Levee breaks, patrons will be awash in beer and delicious cheese balls. (Seriously, those little orange orbs are amazing.) The shabby-chic joint won us over with its wide selection of affordable bottled beer, like Duchesse De Bourgogne and Blithering Idiot—and the handy beer cozies help in summer. Loads of bar games (Big Buck Hunter Pro, darts) in the back are just a bonus. 212 Berry St at North 3rd St, Williamsburg, Brooklyn (718-218-8787, theleaveenyc.com)

Killer jukebox
Rusty Knot
If the notion of an engineered dive bar doesn’t already make your poseur antennae twitchy, head to the latest spot to be ruined on Fridays and Saturdays, thanks to blog buzz for barchitect Taavo Somer and a subsequent infiltration by the Murray Hill wanna-be–socialite set. The cruel twist is that Somer has gotten the details largely right, down to the laugh-out-loud tikki-head cocktail mugs. Go on a weekday night, when you can actually move and hear your jukebox selection, which might be Billy Squier, Thin Lizzy, or Johnny Cash and June Carter. 425 West St at 11th St (212-645-5668)

Where I can be rib cage to bony rib cage with my brethren
St. Jerome’s
Weekend DJs and campy old movies projected onto the walls—not to mention $2 Bud Light drafts—distract from the oppressive eau de body odor at St. Jerome’s, located along a full-fledged hipster corridor, where, depending on the night, you can also get crushed two doors down at low-ceilinged sleaze pit 151.155 Rivington St between Clinton and Suffolk Sts (212-533-1810)

Where there’s room to breathe
Second Chance Saloon
Historically, saloons are places where people get shot for cheating at cards, missing the spittoon or bumping into someone who don’t like bein’ bumped. There isn’t much gunplay at the Second Chance—maybe because there’s usually room enough for everyone. On Saturdays, the place hooks patrons up with free BBQ in the spacious backyard, which clearly helps prevent overcrowding and hunger-induced murder. 659 Grand St between Leonard St and Manhattan Ave, Williamsburg, Brooklyn (718-387-4411)

The Creek and the Cave

Photograph: Dave Sanders

Not in Brooklyn
The Creek and the Cave
Situated close enough to the homeland so as not to cause disorientation, the C&C—populated by the pasty-white, tattooed set—has the dank feel of an old European apartment and sports a rudimentary drink selection. The real draw is the back patio. 10-93 Jackson Ave at 49th Ave, Long Island City, Queens (718-706-8783)

—Dustin Goot and Drew Toal