The snarker image

Chances are good that, while sitting in a cramped airplane seat at 32,000 feet with some time to kill, you’ve picked up a SkyMall catalog and admired the stand-up towel warmer or fountain water bowl for cats (“Let your kitty feel as if she’s drinking out of a mountain stream!”). But what about the things that you really want…say, an Adultery Detector, an iPod Shredder or a “Tickle Me Oswald” Kiddy Book Depository?

Welcome to the world of SkyMaul, an absurdist parallel-universe version of those high-altitude shopping tomes (because really, why should browsing for useless, overpriced items be limited to the terrestrial sphere?), written by the Bay Area sketch group Kasper Hauser. “We do a lot of traveling for shows,” said member Rob Baedecker, “and often we’d start writing fake entries in the catalog or modifying real stuff it sells, just to crack each other up. So we inadvertently ended up with a backlog of these made-up products, and when we started pitching book ideas to our agent, that was the one that got everybody excited.”

Like the best parodies, SkyMaul apes its source material so expertly, it takes a second to realize that all of these ridiculous consumer goods aren’t the real deal. “We’re proud of the fact that, for the Nazi Grandpa Locator, we were able to mimic the photo for an actual SkyMall entry,” says Baedecker. “You almost can’t tell the difference.” The group will be promoting the book with shows at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre on Friday 17 and Saturday 18. “There will be a mixture of past characters from Kasper Hauser sketches and material featured in the book,” he says. “And there will be lots of PowerPoint presentations, which is always a surefire recipe for hilarity.”

Though you can’t buy anything featured in the troupe’s shopping guide, Baedecker can imagine a day when airline passengers might be able to purchase one or two of the Hauser creations. “I’m not sure that anyone would buy a Llamacycle,” he muses, “unless they really, really hated llamas. But I could see the Medical Result Fortune Cookies flying off the shelves. And really, who couldn’t use a good Whor-ganizer?”

Kasper Hauser will perform at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater Friday 17 and Saturday 18.